Boundaries & the Bare Minimum
“Boundaries are the distance at which I can love you and me simultaneously” - PRENTIS HEMPHILL
I think it’s time I get back in my Speakers’ Corner (alas, only momentarily), as I can feel another buzzword rant brewing. Ugh. Yet another term that has forged its way from the comfort and privacy of therapy, onto our feeds and into our mouths - AD NAUSEAM. The overuse of these psychology terms can dilute the true meanings of these words, even when the intentions are pure. While I don’t believe the overuse of ‘boundaries’ is harmful, it’s more about the risk of becoming desensitised to a healthy objective that many of us struggle with (hi, it’s me). In closing, I will now proceed with an entire article and a few Insta posts about… BOUNDARIES, lol. The hypocrisy is not lost on me. For me though, it’s more about the importance of the meaning and for those who are trying to mould a more secure/healthy attachment style and master self-assurance.
Attachment Theory & How Attachment Styles Form
“The propensity to make strong emotional bonds to particular individuals [is] a basic component of human nature” - John Bowlby.
I will preface this article by saying my grasp on this topic is very much a ‘LIP’ (learning in progress - and yes, i’ve totally just remixed a WIP there). I am not here in a professional capacity, I am merely discussing my own learnings and interest in this space. This is something I am working through on a personal level with professional guidance, and seemingly gaining a very basic PhD from Google in the process. I’ve previously touched on pop psychology and terminology that is commonly used and misused, so I was rather humbled after disappearing down a rabbit hole of literature and podcasts about attachment theory, and then the styles that are more commonly known. I have learned a lot and am keen to explore the differing attachment styles in more detail and how they grew from the attachment theory.